Game of Thrones season six preview

I need to preface this article with a lengthy paragraph concerning spoilers. This article has them. In fact, just assume everything here is a spoiler for anyone who hasn’t seen all 5 seasons and is at least familiar with some concepts from the books, as I will be making predictions for season 6. DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU WANT TO SEE SPOILERS. EVERY SENTENCE IS A SPOILER. SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER.
SPOILER

 

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER.

 

Now I can begin.

 

Jon

I do want to start with the elephant in the room. Many of you are questioning whether or not Jon Snow is actually dead, or that he might come back from the dead in some way. I did some soul searching, show watching, and book reading and I have come to a decision.

Jon Snow is 100% dead.

I know that may have hurt some of you, but I have my reasons. In fact, I have four reasons why Jon Snow is almost certainly dead and not coming back. They are based off of theories I have heard for bringing him back to life.

-Melisandre

The theory surrounding Melisandre is that she’ll be able to bring Jon Snow back to life similar to how Thoros of Myr brought Beric Dondarrion back to life earlier in the show. For this to happen, Melisandre would have to get to Jon Snow immediately following Olly stabbing him in the heart, and that would involve getting past roughly 20 traitors of the Night’s Watch. She won’t be able to get to his body in time to save him. Even if she does happen to get past all of those men and get to Jon’s body on time, what has she ever done that makes us believe that she’s special in any way at all? I’ve been observing her actions since her first appearance in season 2 (or a Clash of Kings) because I knew that she would be important later on (I had the end of A Dance with Dragons spoiled for me). Nothing I’ve seen in book or show has impressed me enough to believe that it was actually the work of the Lord of Light. I think she’s a big phony. Hell, I think Thoros of Myr is a big phony too, albeit a super badass one. If you look at everything Melisandre has done since season 2, I think only one thing is her doing: the murder of Renly Baratheon. The other kings that died supposedly because of kings blood (Rob Stark and Joffrey Baratheon-Lannister) were conspired against by people outside of her network. She, essentially, got lucky. Plus, we aren’t even 100% positive that the shadow she produced from her lady parts was the same one that killed Renly. You have to remember that there is a form of expensive assassins in the series that can kill people seemingly like shadows: the Faceless Men. It isn’t out of the realm of possibilities that J’aquen Hgar killed Renly. Melisandre’s visions of Stannis being Azor Ahai were misguided, as he is now dead. Stannis’ death is entirely her fault as well, because convincing him to burn his own daughter caused half of his army to leave him and his wife to take her own life. Basically, Melisandre is the biggest fuck up in the entire series, and I don’t trust Jon’s life to her potentially phony powers.

[Edit: While I think that show Mel has no chance of bringing Jon back to life, I think that book Mel is going to do it. I’m actually pretty confident that she will. Jon Snow, as far as I can theorize, is dead on the show.]

-Warging into Ghost

This theory is popular for those who have read the books but don’t quite understand how TV works. To do something of that magnitude, it needs to be foreshadowed. Jon has never warged into Ghost in the TV series, so he won’t be able to do it as he’s dying. Simple concept, but one that’s hard to rule against. In fact, I think this theory is the strongest for the books due to the prologue chapter of A Dance with Dragons. Why else would they have someone warg into an animal while they were dying if not to set up another character to do it later? I’m calling my shot: Jon Snow will be Ghost in The Winds of Winter.

-Becomes a White Walker

I love this theory, personally. I think it would be badass for Jon to join the other side of the battle for humanity and kill all of his old buddies. Alas, to be a White Walker, you have to be sacrificed at that weird “end of the world” anvil thing. Since Jon died, and died on the other side of the wall, the best we could hope for is him becoming a wight. Wights are creepy and pure evil, unlike the lovable White Walkers. I mean, look at them!

white walker

 

-Joining the weirwood net

No. Albeit possible in the books, this will not happen in the show. No. No no no.

So now that we have all of that taken care of, I can finally get into other characters that actually matter going forward! YAY!

 

Arya

I can’t wait to see what’s in store for Arya. I think we’re mostly caught up with her story arch between the show and the books, but here are some things I would like to see.

 

-Blind for at least two episodes. We’re kidding ourselves if we think her blindness is permanent, but it would be nice to see her struggle through things for an episode or two.

 

-Return to Westeros. At the moment, Arya seems content in Braavos. But you and I both know that she has to return at some point to further the storyline. Hopefully when she returns, she’ll be the next point which is

 

-She is a Faceless Man (girl?). I WANT TO SEE ARYA ASSASSINATE SOME FOOLS. DON’T DENY ME THIS, GEORGE.

 

Sansa

I have no earthly idea what is going to happen to Sansa next. Her storyline in the show is very different than what it was from the books. Maybe she goes back to Robin at the Eyrie? Maybe she finds Brienne after leaving Winterfell and they go to Tarth? It’s hard to tell, but I don’t know if we’ll see much of her this season.

 

Theon

Theon is going to make his way to the Kingsmoot on the Iron Islands after surviving the 100 foot fall with Sansa. He might be elected King, but in all likelihood he will be passed up. Anyway, he’ll be in a much better place than being Reek, which rhymes with bleak.

 

Dorne

This seems like a pretty broad topic to cover, but it’s an important one. Will the Iron Throne go to war with Dorne because they killed Princess Myrcella? In my opinion, I think no, mostly because they have a religious militia terrorizing their own citizens. Revenge against Dorne will have to wait, maybe. Or it would be convenient if a prince of Dorne could be killed for revenge. If only they had one of those…

 

Dany

Dany is just chilling in a field with her dragon, and then she’s approached by a khalasar of Dothraki. My guess is that she’ll be taken to Vaes Dothrak and have to use some of that Dothraki she hasn’t used in a few years. Also, what the hell happened to her blood riders and hand maidens? They just sort of disappeared.

 

Tyrion

I love Tryion’s potential in this season, but I don’t know what’s going to happen with him, other than ruling Meereen for Dany while she’s taking a vacation with Drogon. Varys showed up in classic Varys fashion and I can’t wait for Tyrion to send a letter to his sweet sister in King’s Landing.

 

Potential deaths in season 6

 

This section is sad, and not as extensive as it can or should be. Also note that anybody can die at any time, so don’t come crying to me when Arya or someone majorly important dies.

 

Trystayne Martell

This dude has no chance of living. This is the revenge that Cersi will enact upon Dorne for killing her only daughter. Trystayne will die a slow, painful, likely Qyburn induced death. May the Seven watch over him.

 

Loras Tyrell

The Sparrows are going to kill him for being gay, basically. I don’t see him winning the trial. Tyrell’s are going to be PISSED.

 

Meera Reed

For show watchers, this is a shocker. But for those book loyalists, this is expected. Where does Bran’s blood soup come from? With the death of Jojen at the end of season 4 (still really pissed about that) she’s not gonna be in a good place inside the weirwood.

 

King Tommen

The boy is a bit too nice for King’s Landing. You’re either a player or a pawn, and he’s a straight up pawn and a half. Someone is going to play him into a trap and he will die. It’s the only way to keep the plot going. I just hope he goes down gently with Ser Pounce close by.

 

Davos

Davos likes Jon and is at the Wall, he’ll be targeted by the traitors. Don’t believe me? Watch this. Of everyone listed here, he’s the least likely to die even though he’s probably in the most danger.

 

In short though, I have no idea what’s to come in Season 6. I can’t wait to find out with the rest of you. I’m probably going to be wrong about 95% of this (Jon is dead though) and that’s okay.

 

Game of Thrones premieres April 24th, 2016 on HBO.

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